Ah, friends. They pick you up when you’re down, and laugh with you when you’re all bright and giddy. However, it’s not always bright, shiny, and harmonious in the friendship world. There will be some instances when your relationship will be tested. Issues will surface and then drama will ensue. So how do you stop drama from happening between you and your friend?
1. Think and decide whether there really is an issue or not, because the last thing you need would be you making a fuss over something that’s totally shallow and fixable in the first place.
2. If there really is an issue and you can’t deny that you’re affected by it, why not try to talk directly to that person? Yes, you’re hurt or annoyed, but don’t go rambling about it to another person or worse, to a group of people. Remember, if you go behind that person’s back and talk smack about her, that’s gossiping. It doesn’t matter whether you’re telling the truth or sensationalizing it. The fact that you’re talking to someone other than the person involved is simply rumour-mongering.
3. Never be the gossip source or instigator. If you think you started it, then apologize to the rest of the group then refrain from commenting about this person ever again. If other people talk about her, then just keep quiet. Avoid the topic, or better yet, change it. If they still talk about her despite your dodging efforts, then maybe it’s time that you find yourself a new circle of friends or peers.
4. If this person isn’t really a close friend and merely an acquaintance, then it’s really not worth your time talking about her. If you spend most of your time chatting or even making rude jokes about this person, then you’re just letting her control your life. Why? Because instead of being productive, you’re just using 30% of your energy and your entire day talking about someone who doesn’t even matter. You’re fixated and you already sound like a sore and bitter loser.
5. If your relationship with this person is not that important to you, then just end it. Detach yourself from her and move on. However, if there really is no way of getting rid of this person or you simply have no choice, then ask yourself: Is the issue big enough to merit a confrontation? Or is it something that can be shaken off? If it’s the latter, then forget about it and move on. If it’s that big of a deal, then talk directly to her. Lay all your cards on the table. At least you’re honest enough to tell this person that she hurt you.
6. If you already talked to her and explained your side to the best of your abilities and all you get is hostility or a negative reaction, then walk away. There’s no point in continuing the relationship with a closed-minded person anyway.
7. And last but not least, if what you’re going to say won’t do any good, or if it’s just going to be hurtful or would stir up anger, then just shut it. Remember, harsh words stir up anger. Even if you think you’ve done the right thing, if there’s harshness in your choice of words or even in your tone, then you’re just going to fuel up the other person’s temper. To avoid drama, don’t make one. It’s that plain and simple.